Learning from the Past

Can you believe that we’re almost halfway through January already? Is it too late to say Happy New Year? This past New Year’s was a bit different than the previous ones I’ve celebrated. On January 1st of every year, I used to come up with resolutions and roadmaps on how to achieve those resolutions. This time, I didn’t do that, because what’s stopping me from creating my own intentions/resolutions all year round?

New Year’s is just like any other day - except that there is a lot of pressure that comes with it, or a burning need to get a whole new personality (I’ve been there, and failed that).

There is a lot of pressure that typically comes with New Year’s. However, on the flip side, the day also brings about feelings of a fresh start, or a reset button if you will. It’s the end of a 12-month cycle, and the beginning of a new one. With the end and beginning of any cycle, comes a sense of renewal, hope, and excitement.

I actually started thinking about my New Year’s intentions before January 1st. At the beginning of December, I wrote down my 2023 intentions, and I took advantage of that natural sense of renewal, hope and excitement that comes into play on New Year’s Day by revisiting those intentions.

I paid attention to what I was feeling as I imagined myself fulfilling those intentions. Did I feel excitement? Did I feel motivated? Can I really imagine myself living out those intentions?

I also acknowledged that it is okay if those intentions change or evolve over time throughout the year. I’ve changed and evolved over the last year, so why can’t my intentions do the same?

In the spirit of changing and evolving, I will be starting this year off with a three part blog series that center around those themes…plus a little bit of extra thrown in for good measure:

1. Learning from the Past (this current post) 
2. Living in the Present
3. Embracing the Future
   

I’ll be releasing the next two blogs from the series over the next several weeks!

Looking back at 2022 has taught me a lot. I realized a lot of limiting beliefs that have kept me from truly being present in so many areas of my life. Some of them were related to my hearing loss (check this post on reclaiming my voice here), and others were not. I learned what those limiting beliefs were, and I’m in the process of unlearning and shedding them. 

A major thing that I had to unlearn when it came to my limiting beliefs was how I tried to battle them by establishing as much control in my life as possible. My mentality was that, the more I could control a situation or an outcome as much as I can, the better.

I was so wound up trying to control everything, that I forgot to simply just be, and to live freely. I’ve lost sleep over worrying about how a certain situation will turn out, or wondering ‘what if this happens?’ or ‘what if that person does this?’.

I spiraled thinking of different scenarios, and how I will plan to respond in those scenarios. This type of spiraling happened during conflicts with other people, or during moments where  I felt like I wanted to do something, but then stopped myself from doing it because all those imagined scenarios I made up in my head scared me off from doing it.

Before I knew it, I exhausted myself - and repeated the cycle over and over again. I’m trying to learn from my past, and live a bit more calmly with a ‘so what’ mentality. I can’t control the reactions of other people, or predict what will happen next, I can only control how I react.

For example, if I want to try something different, like going dancing. I try not to spiral thinking about how I might be horrible at it, or my hearing loss will make it hard for me to hear the rhythm, etc. Instead, I think, if it doesn’t work out, or if I don’t like it……so what? It didn’t work out, now I know I don’t like it, or maybe I’ll try again. At least I tried. To be free, I have to start living by letting go of control.

As I looked over my intentions, there was a sense of excitement. I know I’m going to be more intentional with the activities I pursue, the places I go, the people I’m with, and the communities I become a part of.

There are a lot of things that will happen this year! I’ll be:

• going on some exciting trips 
• getting a new cochlear implant (super excited about this one) 
• undertaking some fun and exciting creative projects
• discovering good food
• having beautiful and soulful conversations
• growing and flourishing
  

I’m looking forward to the year ahead, and to the new experiences I will have, and the perspectives I will develop - all of which I will share with you along the way!

What are some intentions you have for this year?